OKcupid profile rough draft, one

28 year old male. Gainfully employed to support excessive daily drinking habit as means of self medicating major clinical depression. Well liked and handsome when able to get out of bed. Occasional anxiety attacks stemming from PTSD and never really using college degree. May become overly attached only to abruptly become cold and distant. Seeking well read female. Substance abuse issues a must. No fatties, plz.


JULY 2014

attention interested parties the coming week’s forecast is bleak bleak bleak. they say it is a disease of the personality. three short, three long, three short. no no no that is a distress call beaten into flesh. you will hear me coming. 

JUNE 2014

 Grandmother’s advice for my father when he told her he was having a child: Don’t have them, the heartache outweighs the joy. Happy Father’s Day. 

MAY 2014

sense of mourning so palpable you find yourself phantom chewing with your mouth very full. Perpetual states of leaving lead to a visibly shook posturing. the welcome distraction of those bruised thighs grasping your head cause your shoulders to roll back and getting out of bed in the afternoon becomes a little easier. 

FEB 2014

the frosted glass enclosure burst red from gray as the surrounding fields became engulfed in flames. I saw your hair short and red as when we first met. Suddenly realizing that I had been masturbating the strokes came at a violent pace. I awoke to you knowing I would disappear by the end of this. 

MAY 2014

careless kissing//friendly fucking

throw the breaker to that flesh machine

do you know what she said to me?

"why won’t you just behave?"